You are all invited to the Church at Brook Hills - 11 am service - I'm getting baptized!

I’m getting baptized this Sunday. When I was young, I said a prayer and walked down an aisle and was immersed in a body of water by a great pastor in front of a Bible believing, loving church. But it is only recently that God opened my eyes to the truth of the gospel, so I have decided to REALLY be baptized now. I rehearsed what I would say during my video testimony that is shown at my church whenever one gets baptized. But the 60 seconds it needed to be was not enough time to tell my story the way I wanted to; I had to agree with Daniel, the great video guy at Brook Hills, that a video testimony was not the time to tell jokes, talk about sex, or do “shout outs” to my small group, so I want to do all of that here:

I was raised in a Christian home and was very involved in church until I went off to college. I didn’t give a lot of thought to what I believed…I just thought I had gotten out of the line going to hell and gotten into the line going to heaven. I’ve tried to go back and recall that time but honestly the main thing I remember is boys. Youth group was tremendously fun: skiing at Jay’s lake house, hayrides, playing “Kiss and Tackle” in the fellowship hall (I know…not the ideal game for hormonal teenagers.) I remember having Bible studies, but mostly I remember the Chic jeans I felt so cool in and deciding who I would stand behind playing Frogger at the Arcade at Eastwood Mall. (Standing behind a boy and cheering him on was code for I like you, in case you didn’t know.) How I was raised definitely kept me a “good girl”: there was a definitive line between good and bad, and it didn’t occur to me to cross it.

I had a common response to college and exposure to different beliefs and attitudes: I looked down and couldn’t see the line anymore. Short version of the next 20 years: I came to believe there were many valid paths to some sort of “higher power” and that Christians were, for the most part, naïve and simpleminded. Priding myself on being a free spirit with an open mind, I read every New Age book on the market, had a life coach, had my tarot cards read, looked into Wicca (the supposed “good” magic), meditated, fung shui’d my apartment, and had my natal chart analyzed. (Please note that I lived in Southern California during most of this.)

2005 and 2006: My boyfriend committed suicide, my dad died, and I decided there wasn’t even a “higher power” out there. I remember my sister saying to me as I sobbed about missing Daddy, Laura I just wish you had the faith that we (she and my mom) have; then you wouldn’t be so sad. You would know where he was and that you’d see him again. And I said, Carol, I’m sorry. I so wish I believed that, too, but I just don’t. If I could make myself believe, I would.

Fall of 2007. A series of events occurred involving Carol praying for an intercessory for me, the appearance of a Christian boy in my life, and me going to Brook Hills to show off for said boy. And God used David Platt’s sermons, books I had been given, a Tres Dias weekend, and conversations with friends to open my eyes. That is what it felt like. I didn’t DO anything. It was as if I had been blind and didn’t even know it. And then I could see.

I realized that there were some fundamental truths I had never fully grasped. I had never really understood just how exactly it “worked” that Christ as a man dying on a wooden cross because one sinned was going to get one to heaven. I took other people’s word for it when I was younger, but it never made a whole lot of sense. I vividly remember the sermon where David said: it wasn’t the physical suffering – it was Christ taking the full wrath of God for unpunished sin…for my sin…and that HAD to happen because of God’s inherent nature as all good yet all just. It was a like a light bulb went off, and I just “got it.” So THAT’s what this is all about…how did I not understand this before?? And every Sunday when David would give us a sneak preview of what he would discuss the next Sunday I’d think – I cannot wait that long. I need to hear that NOW! I’ll stay a few more hours...really. In my younger years I thought of church as something you endured because somehow just being there was “good” for you. But now it was completely different. I was on the edge of my seat wanting to know what the Bible said about this…and about that. I wanted to know it all right then. What is my life supposed to look like? How can I become more like Jesus? Who is God?

So I came to believe that the Bible was the living word of God, and it has changed my life. The main thing that has changed is that I realize that it’s not all about me – what God’s going to do for me, what’s going to make me happy. I was created to glorify God; that’s my purpose. And that’s why I want to be baptized as a symbol and public statement of my new life as a believer. I am profoundly grateful that my mom and sister never gave up on me through the years. Thank you for your prayers and patience. I have great friends who stood by me – especially through the “I don’t even think there’s a God” period. And my fabulous small group to whom I am able to say whatever the heck it is I’m thinking, including repeatedly expressing my astonishment that there are things as a single adult that I’m just not supposed to do anymore! I am still a work in progress, but God is changing me from the inside out, and I am a new creation in Christ.